How to manage stress when life gets busy again

For many of us, September can feel like a second January. Children return to school, work schedules become busier and the relaxed routines of summer are replaced by packed calendars and growing to-do lists. Even positive changes can require mental and emotional adjustment, leaving us feeling under pressure before the new routine has properly begun.

According to Dr Heather McKee the objective should not be to remove every source of stress from our lives. Some pressure is unavoidable. Instead, we can become better at recognising when stress is building and develop practical ways to respond before it becomes overwhelming.

Recognise what stress looks like for you

Stress does not always arrive in an obvious way. It can appear as tiredness, irritability, difficulty concentrating, disrupted sleep or the feeling that even small tasks are becoming harder to manage.

The first step is to pause and identify what may be contributing to those feelings.

Rather than simply telling yourself that you are stressed, try to be more specific. Is your workload becoming unmanageable? Are you struggling with the return to routine? Are financial concerns, family responsibilities or a lack of downtime adding to the pressure?

Identifying the source of stress helps separate the things you may be able to change from those you cannot control.

Avoid the temptation to change everything

When life feels overwhelming, it is natural to believe that a complete reset is needed. We decide that we are going to exercise every day, overhaul our diet, improve our sleep and become more organisedall at the same time.

This all-or-nothing approach can create even more pressure. Dr McKee’s work on lasting behaviour change emphasises the importance of starting with actions that are realistic within the life you already have. A small habit that can be repeated consistently is more valuable than an ambitious plan that becomes impossible to maintain. That could mean taking a short walk at lunchtime, preparing for the following morning before going to bed or taking a few quiet minutes between finishing work and beginning the evening routine. The action does not need to be dramatic. It simply needs to be achievable.

Build small moments of recovery into your day

We often think rest only counts when we have a full evening, a free weekend or a holiday ahead of us. In reality, short periods of recovery throughout the day can also help us manage pressure.

Look for natural pauses in your existing routine. You might take a few slow breaths before opening your laptop, step outside after lunch or leave your phone in another room while having a cup of tea.

These moments may seem small, but they create a break between one demand and the next. They also give you an opportunity to notice how you are feeling rather than continuing on autopilot.

The key is to connect the new action to something you already do. For example, every time you finish a meeting, stand up and stretch. When you make your morning coffee, take a moment to consider your main priority for the day.

Attaching a new behaviour to an established routine makes it easier to remember and repeat.

Protect the foundations of your wellbeing

When schedules become busy, healthy habits are often the first things to disappear. Sleep is shortened, movement is pushed aside and opportunities to connect with other people are replaced by another hour spent catching up on work or household tasks.

However, these basic habits can help us feel better equipped to deal with pressure. The goal is not perfection. Missing a walk, having a poor night’s sleep or ordering a takeaway does not mean that your routine has failed. What matters is returning to the habits that support you when you can.

A flexible routine is more likely to survive a busy week than one that depends on everything going exactly to plan.

Be careful how you speak to yourself

Stress can be intensified by the way we respond to our own difficulties.

When we feel that we are falling behind, our internal voice can quickly become critical. We may tell ourselves that we should be coping better or compare our lives with people who appear to have everything under control.

Dr McKee encourages a more compassionate approach to behaviour change. A difficult day is not evidence that you have failed. It is information that something in your routine may need to be adjusted.

Consider what you would say to a friend experiencing the same pressure. Extending some of that understanding to yourself can make it easier to recover and take constructive action.

Decide on one action you can take today

Managing stress does not have to begin with a major lifestyle change.

Choose one small action that would make today feel slightly more manageable. Write down the task that is occupying your thoughts. Ask someone for help. Take a short break without looking at your phone. Move an unnecessary commitment to another day.

Small actions help restore a sense of control. Over time, those actions can become habits that make it easier to respond when life becomes demanding again.

Stress may be part of everyday life, particularly during periods of change. However, by recognising it earlier, responding with greater self-compassion and introducing manageable moments of recovery, we can prevent pressure from controlling the entire day.

 

Dr Heather McKee is a Behaviour Change Specialist and Irish Life Health Ambassador.